l'Arc de Triomphe

[Onlyforfun]

The Arc of what???

Nice of the French to pre-build a monument for everyone who has invavded them.

[presto]

do you know that a french tank has 6 gears.

1 forward, 5 reverse
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how do you recognise a french soldier?

he marches backwards.

[Onlyforfun]

Put your hand up if you like the French.

Put both hands up if you ARE French.

[Win2Win]

After losing the Olympics, I hear they are 'hopping' mad :D

[presto]

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Welshman

Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and a Welshman are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish" says the genie.

The Welshman says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Wales."

With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in Wales was forever made fertile for farming.

The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country. Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye,'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France.

The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall.

The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out."

The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water."

...................................................

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney (AP), Paris, March 5, 2003

The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney.

The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

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[presto]

the official magasine of the french military:

[presto]

Q: Why do the French eat snails?
A: It gives them speedier reactions.


Why is good to be french?
You can surender at the begining of the war, and britain will win it for you.

What is the first thing the French Army teaches at basic training?
How to surrender in at least 10 languages.

What is the most useful thing in the French Army?
A rearview mirror, so they can see the war.

Why does Nike like the French Army?
Because, in war time, they are the biggest buyers of running shoes.

Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris?
It's not known, it's never been tried.

Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in World War II?
And that's because it was raining

Why are there so many tree-lined boulevards in France?
Germans like to march in the shade.

Then why are the French chopping down the trees now?
The Arabs like to march in the sun.

Q: What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII?
A: "Table for 100,000 m'sieur?"

What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
The army.

Q: Why do the French Smell?
A: So blind people can hate them too!

How many gears does a French tank have?
Five, four in reverse and one forward (in case of attack from behind).

How did the French react to German reunification?
They put up speed bumps at the borders to slow down the panzers.

A man askes his companion, "What's the most common French expression"?
His friend scratches his head, shrugs his shoulders and replies, "I give up!"